Episodes
Tuesday Apr 16, 2024
S5 E20: Sock it to Me!!?
Tuesday Apr 16, 2024
Tuesday Apr 16, 2024
Season 5 Episode 20: The Sentinel
So over on Latona we have your basic planet of these guys: “Yo, our forebears made us a cool shieldy kind of thing and then we all got real, super dumb and have no idea how it works. Well, except that one guy NID murdered.”
The result? Of that plus not being Daddy’s favorites? SG-9 is dead and SG-1 has to get some a-holes out on work release to help fix the set of Rowan and Martin’s Laugh-In before the Gooooooooooolds win!
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Tuesday Mar 26, 2024
S5 E19: Daddy Made Me Wrong!
Tuesday Mar 26, 2024
Tuesday Mar 26, 2024
Season 5 Episode 19: Menace
We meet the Proto Borg Robot that MADE the Replicators eons ago. She exclaims that DADDY MADE ME WRONG! Daniel doesn't hear any of that ableist nonsense and tries to help her. That and everyone else's (except Teal'c, bless him) bad decisions end up with Replicators ON THE BASE!
This has to be the end, right? Well, no, because GENERAL ACTION DADDY joins the fray, puts on a black T-shirt, packs some heat, and obliterates all those lego spiders. And Jack shoots the robot girl in front of Daniel, sealing their fate as Ex-Best Friends. Good episode.
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S5 E18: Teal'c has to stop joining Cults, man!
Tuesday Mar 12, 2024
Tuesday Mar 12, 2024
Season 5 Episode 18: The Warrior
Well, Teal and Bray Bray go see that the Jaffa Rebellion is alive and well in the hands of a charismatic leader, a man who is SUPER into keeping the rebels fed, SUPER loves help from the SGC, and SUPER DUPER hates the idea and usage of suicide bombers in his outfit.
Actually, he LOOOOOVES all that, so O'Neill is like, "Nah, wrong Jaffa Rebellion. Let's roll out Teal'c!" But Teal'c apparently super LOOOOOVES all that too, and decides to quit his job and his best friend to join this guy.
Alot more stuff happens in the episode. Take a gander by pressing that there Play button.
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Tuesday Feb 27, 2024
S5 E17: With Friends Like the Assguards, You Might Blow up Your Planet
Tuesday Feb 27, 2024
Tuesday Feb 27, 2024
Season 5 Episode 17: Fail Safe
You GUYS! The Gate Gang litrally hyperdrives through planet Earth! I didn’t even know they could do that! And it is soooo much smarter than blowing it up.
The Gooolds try to sabotage/destroy Earth without openly violating their Assguard treaty and that’s what happens because between you and me, I don’t think those little grays even care about the Tauri. Tau’ri? Taur’i?
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Tuesday Feb 13, 2024
S5 E16: Daniel Jackson: Edging Lord
Tuesday Feb 13, 2024
Tuesday Feb 13, 2024
Season 5 Episode 16: The Last Stand
Yeah, that’s right, Deej continues to come close to murdering some System Lords only to back off at the last minute, ruining the whole situation. Very Frustrating! Small compensation at least that he totally misses out on that nonconsensual body-sharing shit over in the crystal caves when Lantash simply has to have Lt Elliot or he’s “gonna die”.
Also, maybe the System Lords are sort of…losing their collective shit? OK, eat your young, but why are you biting them from the middle and making a big ol’ mess? Who eats like that? It’s giving Darryl Hannah eating a lobster in Splash cannibal vibes.
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Tuesday Jan 30, 2024
S5 E15: Never Send a Daniel Jackson to do a Seargent Jackson's Work
Tuesday Jan 30, 2024
Tuesday Jan 30, 2024
Season 5 Episode 15: Summit
For the love of fuck, every time I watch this episode I get detonate-the-bomb blue balls. DJ is a horrible kill-all-the-system-lords tease.
Zipacna, the coolest Gooldie of them all, is at least getting some work done, as the Tokra are TUH-OAST with the attack of Gou'ld fleet. Will Daniel grow at LEAST a single, and pull the trigger. Find out next week. Two-parter biz-natches!
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Tuesday Jan 16, 2024
S5 E14: I Liked the One with Eddie Murphy Better
Tuesday Jan 16, 2024
Tuesday Jan 16, 2024
Season 5 Episode 14: 48 hours
Teal’c is buffering. Literally. Like, he’s operating from an AOL CD, so we won’t see him but for the first and final three seconds of the episode.
It has also come to the attention of these dear pod hosts that this one horrible hot pile of steaming microwave-reheated cat turds by the name of Dr. McKay is somehow a beloved regular on Atlantis? Frozen Siberian Tundra must do wonders for the soul, because that dirt bag is so canceled right now.
And aside from the things he does that makes him so hateable, he tries to murder Teal’c in the buffer zone! WTAF???
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Tuesday Jan 02, 2024
S5 E13: Training Drills All the Way Down
Tuesday Jan 02, 2024
Tuesday Jan 02, 2024
Season 5 Episode 13: Proving Ground
Listen. Look. These cadets are almost like having a kid leading the episode. It’s whatever, but for some reason the SG-C is designing elaborate scenarios to get the Big Top Boy cadet to pass the training even though the Dainty Little Miss cadet is already there at the start of the episode with no extra help? As a great man once asked, “Why don’t you put her in charge?”
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Tuesday Dec 19, 2023
S5 E12:The Best Episode of SG-1 Ever!
Tuesday Dec 19, 2023
Tuesday Dec 19, 2023
Season 5 Episode 12: Wormhole X-Treme
I know the one where Sam and MacNeil basically express their romantic love for each other because they’re separated by a goooold shield wall thingy and think they’re dying is also good, OK. But in this episode, frequent double dipping creative consultant Peter DeLouise makes sure we know whom he’d cast as Colonel Jack O’Neill with two els, his wee little brother. So meta, so fun.
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Tuesday Dec 05, 2023
S5 E11: The Five-Nine Feisty Lady!
Tuesday Dec 05, 2023
Tuesday Dec 05, 2023
Season 5 Episode 11: Desperate Measures
Jack’s real bestie is back in town baybee! Hutch. Or Starsky. Carter cannot literally not even catch a break! She is kidnapped leaving the gym, a fantastic reason to never work out. Or leave the house.
Anyhoozle, that Jolinar schtick really bites her in that ass this week. Ultimately the Gate Gang comes out on top in this one. Wild, I know.
Also, HAPPY 100 EPISODES TO US! Help us celebrate by joining our Patreon! ComeTrya!!!!
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